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Best Laughs Online

Posted by on March 25, 2008

I always thought the best way to get a good belly laugh on the internet was to surf around on YouTube. I mean, there`s always someone getting hit in the head with a shovel, little kids biting each other, or a fat girl falling down a hole.

Now I’ll admit, the girl falling in the hole isn’t laugh-out-loud funny, but if you look inside yourself you’ll admit that the funny is somewhere in there.

But even with these entertaining clips I’ve decided YouTube takes second place to the group of websites out there that churn out quality comedic material each and every day.

ONLINE DATING SITES

Since I’ve been back in Canada a few friends have convinced me to join some of these sites and I’ve had some hilarious experiences. You really get to see what kind of people are out there when you take some time to read through some of these sites. The other day I had somehow pissed away two hours just reading profiles, responding to random emails from strangers and having myself a right good laugh throughout the process.

I can only give you my perspective of the girls on these websites, but after a few read-throughs its easy to pick out who seems like a decent person or who just got their heart ripped out and tossed into a woodchipper. Below I’ve paraphrased from several profiles I’ve read:

“I’m just looking for a nice guy, who MUST be HONEST, not a low life cheater. I have no more room in my life for people who play games or can’t tell the truth.”

To me, this girl is carrying more baggage than transatlantic flights from Toronto to Rome.

Even better are the 80% of girls that write “Hi guys, I’m looking for a nice, attractive, ambitious guy that can make me laugh. I really love to laugh”

Each time I read one of those creative masterpieces I laugh, because lets stop for a moment and consider the alternative. Is there anyone out there that would request:

I’m just on here searching for a weird looking, lazy asshole that’s very very boring. I’m not a huge fan of enjoyable things so I need someone with no interests, passions, or hobbies. Oh, and if you’re bordering on alcoholism at the moment, I’m your girl. Can’t wait to hear from you”

To round out my top 3 favourite profiles are the girls that think they’ve given all males online an early christmas gift by adding themselves to the site. Let me give you a specific example on this one.

This girl, wrote me a short email so I took a look at her lengthy profile. Perhaps I’m the asshole but I didn’t find it hard to figure out that her ego is so inflated it current floats somewhere between Saturn’s 2nd and 3rd moons. Personally, I’m not ready for a space expedition. The unsaid truth about these hordes of dating sites is that no matter how witty or clever the woman or man may be, if there is no attraction between you and the profile picture on the screen, that’s where communication goes to die. I don’t think that’s a bad thing either. That’s just life. If both people are attracted to one another AND they get along, well that’s when we have lift off. (pun intended).

You just have to go into online dating the same way you would offline and consider rejection the price to play. If I message a girl I think is gorgeous and I see she’s read my message yet hasn’t written back, odds are she thinks I’m a goblin or something equally revolting. Surprisingly, I’ve learned to be cool with that. I have a friend who once dated a girl I thought looked identical to Jar Jar Binks, but he thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. Beauty is 100% in the eye of the beholder.

Conversely, none of us want to be in a relationship with someone that doesn’t find us attractive. I figure, if you’re physically attracted to someone, if they don’t feel the same, then that should automatically disqualify them from being your “type”. Makes sense doesn’t it? Usually your type of person WILL indeed find you to be attractive, so why waste time and energy on people that don’t. They’re CLEARLY not your type!

As highly entertaining as these sites may be, I do believe they serve a very important purpose that Western culture needs. They bring people together who otherwise would not have met. With our increased hunger for the big payday, exorbitant working hours and illogical desire to keep up with “The Joneses” … its getting increasingly tougher to get out of your circle of comfort and find a person you want to spend your time with. Especially with shows like Sex and the City, Entourage, and Grey’s Anatomy, marriage and monogamy aren’t exactly touted as the cool thing to do.

At least with online dating it allows people the fastest route to market to meet and hang out with a few new acquaintances outside their core circle of comfort and hopefully meet someone great enough to inspire an exodus from both online and offline dating.

And since I feel a little bad about making “Angel-Lynn” a target for ridicule on this post, I’ll allow everyone to view and have a good laugh at mine as well.

Enjoy!

Feel free to leave me some comments with any anecdotal stories about online dating because I know there’s a lot out there. And yes, Facebook and MySpace count for online dating.

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