“There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.”

I feel this way each time I return from an extended trip abroad.  From each trip I’ve taken, usually to Europe, I find I see the world in a different way. Sometimes the grander sites stand out to me in drastic meaningful ways, and sometimes the simpler aspects of life call out to me in a way I’ve never heard before.

And regardless of my experience while I am away, home always looks different when I return.  I find I understand people differently, I see their lives differently, and I experience those around me in a new way.

For better or for worse, after a lengthy trip like my current one (2.5 months in BaIrcelona [w/ multiple side trips]), things are never the same.  I know now that I am already not the same person as when I left for Barcelona in May.  I feel better. More alive.

I have more goals now that I want to accomplish, places I’d like to visit, and milestones I’d like to reach before I turn 35 that didn’t exist 3 months ago.

This trip has left a definite impact on me.  I LOVE living in Barcelona, and I love Europe.  But I don’t like visiting anymore, I just like being here. Just the simplicity and feeling of being somewhere new and not having to rush through every “experience” like a madman with a tourist map.

For exampe, I used to tell people that 3-5 days was enough to see all there is in Barcelona and now I know how truly false that was. I have one of my best friends currently visiting me for two weeks and at the start of week #2, only now has he covered 90% of what this city has to offer.

I imagine I’ve made these same mistakes with other cities in the past as I always tried to do whirlwind stops of large cities, just wanting to be able to tell people I’ve been there.  All the while I was robbing myself of actually experiencing the city itself.

I imagine european cruises are like this.  People rushing on and off ships like locusts, pouring through the city of the day over several hours, taking photos on the fly and only actually remembering what they saw once they return home and review their digital masterpieces on their PCs.  Because the truth is that sometimes you spend so much time looking at your camera, you never actually look at where you are.

And its not their fault, this is the nature of the north american european vacation.  North Americans typically treat trips to Europe like a trip to the mall, and their whole trip ends up as nothing more than more interesting fodder for their Facebook profiles.  But again, because of how vacations are handed out like rations in north america, and flight/hotel prices are a scandal… these trip designs are out of necessity.

What I’m saying, is that I think the most valuable lesson I’ve come away with on this trip is how incredibly lucky I am to have had this experience.  The chance to live, at will, in Barcelona and travel to places like London, Veneto (italy), San Sebastian, Roses, Calella, for little mini-trips is something I try to remind myself everyday is NOT NORMAL.

I’m looking forward to seeing how the world around me will have changed when I return to Canada, because with all that I’ve seen in Europe, I still love my home country (minus their brutal tax system).

But its only a matter of time until I am on another plane. Europe certainly hasn’t seen the last of me.

Sure, there are your typical negatives that come with any city, like air quality,  less green space, and noise, but Barcelona more than makes up for it with its vast other qualities.

The most important of which is weather.

Barcelona doesn’t get snow. For me, that’s enough of a factor to put Barcelona ahead of nearly every North American city. Because it doesn’t matter if your city is giving out free blowjobs and cunnilingus as part of a weekly community service program; because that doesn’t excuse the fact that going for a walk in the winter can be considered an act of courage.

Consistent good weather is such an underappreciated boost to everyday happiness, that now the thoughts of experiencing another Canadian winter puts me into a emotional state, that is kin to a 4 year old revolting in a grocery store aisle.

Next is convenience…

There are so many little bakeries, coffee shops, pharmacies, grocery stores, and restaurants that are within 7 steps of every apartment building in the city that regardless of whatever you need throughout the day, its waiting for you to just come and get it.  And remember, you’ll never need boots, a touque (look it up if you’re not canadian), gloves, and 3 layers of shirts before you leave the house.

Next is transportation….

This is pretty simple. Having to own a car and drive everywhere is a burden and waste of money.  With the eurorail system throughout the continent, and a city of cheap taxi rates, an amazing and cheap metro/public transport system, next to free bicycle rentals….

Driving is almost completely unnecessary. And if it is necessary, the city is so manageably sized that owning a scooter is a very viable and efficient option.  Plus is 1/10th the cost and upkeep of a car.    Calculate how much you spend on your car(s) every year (including purchase price, gas, maintenance, insurance, renewal, etc) and then think about how different your life would be if you had all that money in your bank account instead.

Next up… FOOD.

Fresh produce. Fresh coffee that is well made. Restaurants that span the flavour spectrum from italian and tapas, to middle-eastern and Asian fusion.  If you want to eat something specific tonight, Barcelona has it.

Now if those reasons weren’t good enough, here is the clincher.

THE BEACHES.

Barcelona is home to some amazing beaches.  Sure, they aren’t as perfect as Hawaii or Thailand, but there are nearly a dozen beach spots between Barcelona and Costa Brava, which is an hour away. And then Costa Brava has some truly incredible beaches.

So the quality of most of the beaches aren’t the true selling features of Barca, but when you juxtapose this element of decent to good beaches along with the city itself… its a homerun.

I am not even going to dive into the fact that Barcelona basically has a parade or some amazing event every other week and its lounges and nightlife are so much fun, no matter if you just want to go out for a nice drink and some jazz, or light up the town with the younger, dancier (its a word now) citizens.

I could go on, but maybe you should just come and experience it for yourself.

Barcelona is the kind of city, that every other city wishes it could be…. yet never stands a chance.

Everyday can’t be different. Everyday can’t be an adventure.  That’s not abnormal or extraordinary…that’s anarchy. And anarchy has no roots, it has no foundation, its just simply day after day of chaos and mess.  This is just yet another lesson I am learning on my road to, hopefully, an extraordinary life of traveling and fortunes.

Everyday I try to be protective here in Barcelona, but with a beautiful girlfriend bouncing around our apartment in short shorts, a bakery with delicious foods across the street,  the most beautifully sunny days on our back patio, and a beach 20 minutes away, its difficult to focus my energies solely on capitalism and output.  But I am learning.

I am learning, firstly, to live within the anarchy.  And now slowly I am shaping it to maneuvre within it and function on a daily basis that includes 1 part office rat, 1 part hedonistic, and 1 part poet.

Production.

Rapture.

Realistic awareness of my incredible lucky and life span.

The great trifecta and goal for the rest of my life (at least as stated for today), because without all 3 pieces it starts to slip away.

Without production I slip into the mode of struggling hippy artist, spending my days working in a record shop and my nights getting high and pondering what I would name a cross between a Peacock and a Wild Boar.

Without rapture I become a workaholic obsessed with an endless supply of money and toys, taking pleasure only in the acquisition of more toys and more monetary success, fearful for the end of my success and pushing into a future filled with nothing by further fear.

Without realistic awareness I risk losing my sense of time. The moment.  We often take for granted how long and how short our lives are, and how meaningless most problems or stresses truly are.    So if I can keep hold of these 3 virtues, that I basically just made up (not unlike catholicism making up their “holy trinity”),  hopefully I keep living the dream.

Because goddamn it…. right now… life is amazing.

Who wouldn’t want to turn this abnormality into a perpetual existence?

Except for a few overnight trips around Spain and 8 days in Italy, we decided to spend our time primarily as Barcelona locals. And the experience has been eye-opening regarding the difference between home in Hamilton, Ontario and the life in Spain.

Now of course, the major difference most people need adjusting to for a long trip like this is the lack of family and friends nearby, although with skype, gmail chat, and super great calling rates the only real difference I have noticed is the time zone difference.  Living my life 6 hours ahead of the majority of the people that are important to me makes communicating rather tricky at best (although it may also be because I have made a temporary exodus from Facebook and no longer have IM on my iphone.

But most important, I think what I am starting to realize is that I am just much more comfortable, and consequently happier, living the minimalist lifestyle (which I only realize while I am traveling).   The most relaxed and happy I have ever been in my life is when I have been traveling and living in Europe.

Warmer winters aside, I have always loved the freedom of having an entire continent and the thousands of years of history at my doorstep. I find the thrill of new adventures are ever so close and available and I enjoy the constant emails from family members about “being on yet another trip. Are you even going to settle down?” lol.

My simple answer…. probably not.

For some the term might be a description of a calmer, gentler, less scary, kinder life. The point in time in when you become an adult. Life is stable, and you can take solace in the fact that you know where your future is headed.

Personally I think that’s a bit delusional so my personal definition is slightly different, and in fact, the term itself makes me a little nauseous and uncomfortable, like when someone farts near you in a small room after they’ve had mexican food. yeh, kinda like that.

Remember as a kid when you were having an incredibly fun time with your friends, laughing and making up absurb ways to make one another laugh?

Then just when you were about to start creating the rules for a new game you could play with a 3-legged dog and a box of apple jacks  comes the sound of pseudo authority reigning down their opinions and judgement with the famed buzzkilling request of,  “settle down” guys.

I don’t see much of a difference in this example and the suggestions most of my well-intentioned friends and family mean.

I have never been the “get married, buy the biggest house I can afford, start a family, and start buying/collecting things forever” type of person. And as for landscaping and home-repair… well, let’s just say those skills and desires were not passed down through genetics.

To watch me try to hand a painting on a wall is akin to watching a blind man paint a portrait.  Sure it might get done in the end, but it’s not gonna be pretty during of after. So instead of deciding that my life has to be a certain way that sounds awful to me, somewhere along the way I decided to start being honest with myself in terms of what is really going to make me feel fulfilled in this one shot at life.

Most people from the time they are in their early teens, dream of owning their own home. They scrimp, and save and work 2, 3, 4 jobs and do whatever they have to do to make that dream come true, and I applaud that goal. Its lofty and its attainable.

But for me, for whatever reason, I never really cared to own a house.  Didn’t seem “interesting” enough to me. And everyone I know that owns a home, after a couple months of moving in, doesn’t really have anything overly positive to say about it. Unless of course they are buying new things for their home, or changing the way it looks, then of course they’ve got more than enough to say.

Its not a big secret that humans thrive on novelty.  New things excite us, they make us yearn for more and feed the reward center of our brains with the satisfaction of gathering new information and experience. And in my eyes, owning a home always got in the way with chasing experiences I wanted.   It was never the novelty I was chasing.

I’m not against marriage, nor having a family, but my idea of settling down has evolved to a significantly different place than most of the people I know.

For example, I’ve recently (the last couple years) met and become friends with people who travel quite regularly, home school their children, and live a life of experience and learning.  It has really been eye-opening for me, and has blown the doors off of all my misconceptios about home schooling.  ( Yet another case of me finding out something I have been so clearly ignorant about).   With all of this new knowledge of “non-settlers” not only did it make the case for “settling down” even more off-putting, but its given me new vision of what marriage and family can mean.
Its like there is this completely other dimension and I have found a new species of human being and not to mention this paradigm shift would allow me to keep connected with the one true love of my life…. traveling and learning.

Every since I returned from my first backpacking trip through Europe I don’t think I ever honestly let go of that feeling.  The euphoric rush of arriving by plane or train into a new city, or each day learning something new. Or even better, meeting someone new.

I still remember my long flight home from Athens to Toronto (via London) after my 6-7 week trip through Europe in 2003.

I sat in my upgraded British Airways seat, the humble realization and satisfaction of all that I had seen and experienced flooding over me like a series recap of my favourite TV show.  I was, at that time, completely content with my life and what I had achieved by facing my fears and leaving behind the city, country, and continent I had become so accustomed to.

Looking back at that flight home in October of 2003 up until this moment, I think I now realize how much that trip changed my life, and opened my eyes to just how much of life I was missing while staying comfortably nestled in my cocoon inside Canada.    It was this feeling that has propelled my travels and my current lifestyle.

And though I know not what the future holds for my mobile lifestyle, my online business, or… anything else for that matter; should it all crash and burn tomorrow, it would have been all worth it (especially with this incredible 20 days I’ve already had on this trip).

Regardless of what it may be that makes me happy, everyone is starkly different in their needs.  Each of us individually are the only keepers of to the answers of our own happiness. But I think as long as any of us just keep pushing ourselves towards personal accomplishment and satisfaction, and our type of enjoyment isn’t negatively affecting anyone else, well…

Never *settle.

*”settle” being your own personal definition.