We come into this world totally clueless, and then effectively spend the remaining years on earth just trying to figure shit out. Life may as well just be one Ikea furniture assembly after another.  Just fumbling around with the allan key hoping this new lamp stays together, before moving onto the living room set.

But lately I’ve been falling into discussions with people about what are the reasons that some people continually take tips from the lazy man’s guide to the human existence, while others really try to make somethings of themselves?

And one of the more interesting ideas was that its not so much choosing the easier path, but avoiding the more difficult one. Fear is the most likely factor.

It’s certainly not a secret that  human beings, as a species, aren’t great decision makers.  We’re irrational, emotional, short-term oriented, fearful of the wrong things (see: shark attacks and gay marriage) and dominated by an overwhelming desire to take the path of least resistance.

Therefore, if we experience early in our lives that we can lie to ourselves and/or avoid our problems and not have to deal with any consequences then it only makes sense that this will be our operating principles for the remainder of our lives.

We face difficult, life changing decisions every day.  No matter if its the first day of a new diet, quitting smoking, staying on a diet, or being a better person (father, girlfriend, friend, employee, human being). Everyday there are small decisions that could potentially change your life.

And unfortunately, it’s much, MUCH easier to just slug it through life and slip into habits, patterns, jobs, and relationships that we truly are not satisfied in.   As I look at the many successful people I have met over the past few years I find one theme is fairly common… these people have formed habits and lifestyles that allow them to make better decisions every single day.

They surround themselves with peers and mentors that encourage positive yet difficult decision making, and that means deciding to work more and be more productive.  I am still struggling with this but I am getting better.

Getting up everyday and working towards a difficult goal is not easy.  Collecting a paycheck and avoiding bumping into your boss for 30 years, that’s easy.  One of the biggest things I have learned is that it is typically the better decision to move forward with something grandly ambitious at half-quality to get the ball-rolling, than to sit back and nitpick at the details waiting for perfection, or that “perfect idea”.

Because here’s the secret…

Perfect doesn’t exist.  Anywhere.

Hemingway once said that the first draft of anything is terrible (this explains my blog, which is made entirely of first drafts, haha).

The experience of starting something and learning from the mistakes you make during that process and correcting course is where brilliance is born.

Scientists have, more recently, discovered that happiness within the definition of brain science, comes, not from achieving a goal, but from working towards a challenging and worthwhile goal.  Its comes in the hunt for greatness.

Achievement is short-lived, and is usually only used as fodder for self-confidence while working towards another goal.

We can lie back and hide in the shadows of our own lives to pretend that avoiding difficult decisions and challenges is making life better for ourselves, or we can stand-up and accept the fact that true happiness comes only within the possibility for greatness.

There is a world of people waiting for something amazing to happen to them, and then there are those finding ways to make it happen. And right now, there are so many “wait-ers” that making it happen is getting easier and easier.

Good luck with your hunt!

I had the opportunity to meet and have dinner with a very successful online marketer who happened to be in Barcelona a couple weeks ago. He was in the middle of a 2 month European trip with his wife, four kids, and his parents… all of which, he was paying for.  Pretty amazing!

The common theme that came from this marketer as well as those various articles I’ve been reading is that exercising your personal will power
is one of the most important things we can do in life to be more successful and to me, even from a cognitive standpoint, this makes complete sense.

Unless we train ourselves otherwise, each of us will involuntarily move into the path of least resistance. None of us want to acknowledge critisicm and most people don’t have a lot of real interest in making themselves into a better person than they were yesterday.

There is an overwhelming feeling to take the easy road (sleep in, avoid the gym, blame someone else, do less work, etc.)

Well its time for me (and all of us for that matter) to close that road to future traffic.

Not everything we do in life should be difficult, we need balance, but life shouldn’t be a breeze either. What a boring existence.   Imagine waking up everyday and it was just merely a slight alteration to the day before.  Yaaaaaaaawn!  Where’s the excitement? Where’s the celebration?

Most people seem to get their only excitement through the achievements of others (like their kids, favourite sports team, political party), its easier.
This apathy, I think, is also why gambling is such a profitable business throughout the world. People are just looking for a little excitement, a way to spice up their life with a chance at something more… without having to actually try anything challenging.

Gamblers aren’t placing their bets because they really want to have $50,000 more of savings in their account.  They want the feeling that money brings and the opportunities for fun and stress reduction the windfall would mean to their lives.  Something different from the past 1465 days of real-life reruns.

So to avoid sending my biographical series into reruns as well I’ve decided that doing something everyday that I would prefer not to do is in my best interest for a more productive future.  That’s my hypothesis, so I’ma test it out.

I’ve decided I am going to be blogging a lot more (not everyday, but at least once a week) because writing/blogging, somewhere along the lines started to scare me. Still does for some reason.  Putting myself out there as brashly as I once had, at some point,  became a lot more scary and I began overthinking the consequences to the point of turning myself into all of those naysayers out there that I can’t stand to listen to.  All the negative nancys that have 101 reasons why every idea anyone ever has won’t work .   And I can tell you that I have personally met dozens and dozens of people that are making millions of dollars and living incredible lives proving people like that wrong. The best ideas are always met with a steady stream of people telling you, “nah, that’ll never work.”

To start on this quest of challenging myself, a few months ago I also decided to start going to the gym a lot more and I have successfully been going at least 3x a week for a while now, even while Barcelona, so that’s been amazing.

But my main struggle is waking up at the same time everyday and getting more “business work” done, so these challenges are certainly a work in progress.

There are 3-4 projects that I have open right now that have serious TO-DO lists with up side potential of hundreds of thousands of dollars for me if I see them through to completion, and I flat out just haven’t been as focused and dedicated as I should be and that has to stop…. today.

I can make excuses, and I can cry bloody murder to everyone I see, but it doesn’t change the fact that I am the one ultimately responsible. If I have known distractions in my life keeping me from being more successful, I can get rid of them. If I think being in Spain is an issue, I can fly home.  If I think the chair I am sitting in sucks (which it does), I can buy another one.

All of the factors keeping me from successful escaping the 9-5 lifestyle forever are easily at my grasp and avoiding that reality is challenge #1.

When we take the path of least resistance,  we not only avoid doing things in life that would make us better people, but I think inadvertently we also avoid taking responsibility, I mean full accountability, of who we are and  in what ways we are not living up to the people we should be.

So with that being said….  my blog is written for today, the gym I will be hitting today at 6pm, and I have spanish class at 4pm (new language within the next couple years is a big goal that is proving difficut).

I wish  anyone else that wants to make themselves better, strong, smarter, faster, and more resilient, all the luck in the world, and if there is anyway I can help you, just let me know.

Good luck!

And it is in fact reality that screams in our faces to pay attention to the world around us, the people around us, and not merely let the days we have continually appear in our rear view mirrors.

Personally, I struggle with this. As I sometimes find myself focusing on the future, I forget to be an active participant in my own present.

A good friend of mine, wiser than she recognizes, once wrote about herself:

The consciousness of my own mortality often prevents me from performing menial tasks.

The profound simplicity and naked truth of this sentence always impresses me. At first glance this may look as if it were written by someone who acts as voyeur in this life, but quite the opposite. In my opinion, when you come to truly appreciate the beauty of the life we all have, only the thought of your own mortality can slow you down.

But how do we pay more attention?

Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

—Ferris Bueller

This is the trick, learning to look around once and a while. I don’t practice this enough, but several years ago a good friend taught me a lesson in life awareness that I truly believe every should practice…

How To Walk Like A Macedonian

In 2005 I was transferred from my position in Toronto to work and live in London, England.  During my stay I was fortunate enough to meet a co-worker who would become a lifelong friend (for this story lets call him Vlad).

While in London my working hours ran from noon to 8pm.  As there were only two of us that had been transplanted from foreign soil we were essentially forced to either hang out together or function as an island.  Luckily we hit it off.

Most evenings after work began the same way.  Vlad and I would exit the office at Cavendish Square, walk to Oxford Circus, and decide which way to go look for dinner. From Oxford Circus we’d wander around central London like two vagabonds discussing everything from politics, to relationships, to our careers (or “jobs” as it were) and back. No topic seemed out of bounds and neither side feared debate. And realistically our sole qualifiers for a venue to eat at (from my memory) was that it was new, or that it was pizza we could carry to the arcade.  Yes, simple times.

Oxford Circus

By the end of the first month, Vlad and I were beginning to function like two old friends that had known one another for years. So one night as I began my always quick paced walk into the night, I heard Vlad behind me say, (this next part will all be paraphrased as it has been 5 years so cut me some lack would ya).

“Mike, where the hell are you rushing to? Every night we leave the office and you nearly start sprinting forward to nowhere. I’m tired of keeping up for no good reason.  I think it’s time I taught you to walk like a Macedonian.”

“That sounds great Vlad, but I don’t know if I can drag my knuckles.” (I didn’t say this at all, but it would have been hilarious it I did.)

Vlad began to discuss with me how, as he would sit in the town square in Macedonia he would watch the old men walk with their friends; Slowly, peacefully, with no where particularly  to go.  Vlad said that they seemed at ease and that as he tried it he noticed a big difference in his own perspective as well… so what the hell, I gave it a shot. Its not like I had anything else to do.

Vlad and I began our almost nightly walk through Leicester Square at a pace that made turtles look at us and say, “Right on my brothas, right on.”

No agenda. No place to be, and no direction was the right direction.

This exercise was much more difficult than I anticipated. To walk with purpose and direction is simple. You move forward swiftly, with your head up and prepared to dodge and move. In London that also means to watch you do not take an umbrella in the retina.

Vlad had me slow down so that each step would almost fall into the other, like a graceful stumble, with no further purpose but to stay erect(insert childish laugh) and edge forward.

To walk like a Macedonian takes skill and the ability to relax, to disconnect, which at most times I do not possess.  But as I began to walk lock and step with Vlad I found some amazing changes begin to take place.  My breathing slowed, my muscles relaxed, and for the first time since I had landed in the UK… I could see.

I mean reeeaally see.

Even when I had gone sightseeing on my own during the weekends I found myself on a mission, a mission to see the city of London.

Ipod- Check

Camera- Check

Wallet- Check

Map-Check

Mission is a go.

Deploy to tube station and commence sightseeing…GO! GO! GO!

Even when I was relaxing I was rushing, but not this time.

As I strolled through Leicester square I WAS in the moment.

I could see the pedestrian approaching, not as an obstacle on my path, but as a person living their life in the same space as mine.

During this walk I remember laughing as if someone had told me a joke, because truthfully, the joke had been my speed walking to nowhere mentality, and the punchline was what I had been missing.

Sometimes we have to force ourselves to look around, because it’s not about what’s in front of us, it’s about what is around us, and who we surround ourselves with, be it, friend, family, or stranger. It was a beautiful experience.

Please allow me to be clear on something, I am not saying I walk like a Macedonian full-time now, hell, I’d never get anywhere, but I make sure that every so often I slow myself down so to fully acknowledge where I am.

Several times I have been walking with a friend who would be speed walking to nowhere and I’d spend ten minutes telling them the story of Vlad and teaching them, no matter how long it takes, how to walk like a Macedonian.

Now should I ever catch myself running through life, looking ahead without knowing where my feet are, I am thankful for the gift of the Macedonian Walk, and the gift Vlad gave me that will surely last a lifetime.

Life may not be as long as we would prefer, but if we are able to breathe in the moments we cherish in all their glory, just maybe we can make the memories last a lifetime.

I had an hour to accomplish my goal, return some Christmas presents, and leave with enough time to make it to my next appointment, such is life.

I parked in a random spot, and upon entering the mall I see Subway realized I was hungry.  After finishing my sub I start making my way towards the store.

On my way to the store I bump into an old friend of mine and we begin chatting about the holidays, our lives, and she asks me to join her in Guess to give my opinion on a couple outfits she wants to buy. I look at my watch and realize, why not, who am I to deprive this girl of my opinion on her fashion choices.

 After a fashion show worthy of Next Top Model, we part ways I manage to get back on track, my deadline is looming.

 As I get to the store my phone rings and I instinctually answer, it’s a friend of mine that needs some input on a project he is working on. I look at my watch and decide to give him 5 minutes.

20 minutes later I am in returning my items and realize I have left my receipt in the car and must retrieve it.  After returning from my trip back to my car on the other side of the mall, I return my items and stand there watching the clerk impatiently, while tapping my foot like a 6 year old who hasn’t peed since recess.

 All in all, I was 15 minutes late for my appointment.  This is just one example of how distraction leads all of us to incomplete objectives or sloppy results.

This entire situation could have easily been avoided if I would have done the following to remove the possibility of distraction and interruption.

•  Take 2 minutes to call the store to access their location in the mall and park my car outside the nearest entrance
• Leave my phone in the car
• Eaten after my goal was completed. Nobody ever died because they went an extra 15min without food.

 In today’s society we are all victims to distraction and it is the one giant factor keeping most of us from truly unlocking a side of our minds just brimming with human potential.

 Regardless if the cause is email, text messaging, phone calls, empty relationships, family members, negative thinking or even a bladder that has you in the bathroom every 20min (by the way, you might want to get that last one checked out), all of these are DISTRACTIONS and INTERRUPTIONS.

 We never seem to realize that these small interruptions are keeping us from being the productive, positive, healthy, people we want to be.

 Consistent notable productivity is IMPOSSIBLE with distraction and interruption.

 So today I have chosen to change this and started the 90-Day Wake Up Productive program by Eben Pagan (who runs a $20 million online business as well as business coaching).

 In the introduction video, Eben lays out the 11 Principles of Productivity:

Here are the principles I found most important and my opinion and explanation of them:

 #2 Time Management Is Not About Time At All, But About Managing Ourselves

  We all want to believe that we are different from everyone else, that we are special, and that we function independently from everyone else.   This is both arrogant and misguided. The vast majority of humans function in exactly the same. We are creatures of deep rooted habits.

 We like to think that we CHOOSE to be how we are, when in reality, if you take an overview snap shot of your life, you will find you are likely the same person you were at age 16.  Of course, the externalities of your life have changed, but YOU are pretty much the same.  

 We do not choose success or failure like we choose combo number 3 at Taco Bell. Instead, we must manage ourselves to ensure a level of productivity we are not currently accustomed to.

 #4 Habit IS Destiny

 This adds to principle #2. Once we accept our commonalities as humans, we can begin to deconstruct who we are, so to begin developing structured systems to slowly remove the habits we have built throughout our lives.  

 Once these old counterproductive habits have been removed we can slowly begin to create new, life affirming habits that keep us more positive, more productive, and more forward moving.

 “First you shape your habits and then they shape you”

 #7 Your Future Can Be An Extension Of Your Past Or Something New That You Create

 You can see the principles that resonated with me have a pattern.  I believe it’s important to always

reassess the person you are, make immediate changes where you see deficiencies and dangerous habits.

 If you find your entire existence is merely a reflective of the friends you keep (which is often the case) and you are not happy with your life, your answer is simple, it’s time to sever those relationships and forge new ones.

 Remember, I said the answer is simple, but I never said it was easy.

 #11 If You Want To Wake Up Productive, You Must Take Your Thinking To The Next Level

 “You can never solve a problem on the level in which it was created” – Albert Einstein

 If we are to become the people we wish we could be, we cannot accept our current knowledge, wisdom and habits sufficient.  We must FORCE ourselves to evolve.

 All of these principles have already challenged me to give presence and value to all of the distractions I know have been robbing me of productivity, yet I have done nothing to avoid.

 Here is the short list:

•  My Blackberry- phone calls, emails, text messages, instant messaging, blah blah, ahhhhh!!
•  TV shows- this one is going to be difficult. I have to cut out 80% of the shows I currently watch and set up structured times or a set number of hours for leisure television. I mean seriously, I watch waaay too much House. It’s a flat out problem.
•  Facebook- Within the last month I have almost completely have Facebook under control and am quite pleased with myself.
•  Negative thinking – I have quarantined off most of this side of my brain for the majority of last year, but now I think it’s time to put it to sleep entirely.
•  Negative Relationships- These are friendships or acquaintances that require more time and energy than they give back in positive emotions. We all have these, and I address it more in a post you can find —– HERE

 To write this post, I had to turn OFF my Blackberry and my wireless connection on my laptop, lock myself in my room in total silence and vow not to check email until this first draft was completed.

 I must admit that my mind is going a bit crazy, raging against my desire to single-task focus, but I already feel a little bit more productive. 

 We all have to remember that we are our own worse enemies and that we cannot simply CHOOSE to be different people, we have to FORCE that change.

 If anyone has any questions about productivity that I may be able to help with, please feel free to get in touch.

 Here is to a productive 2010!!

 Happy New Year!!