Comments on: Comedy at the Funeral Parlour http://www.perfectlyturbulent.com/comedy-at-the-funeral-parlour/ Because its better to be riding the waves than fighting them Fri, 26 Feb 2010 20:01:16 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: mcecchin http://www.perfectlyturbulent.com/comedy-at-the-funeral-parlour/comment-page-1/#comment-1389 mcecchin Sun, 26 Oct 2008 19:31:08 +0000 http://www.perfectlyturbulent.com/?p=344#comment-1389 I completely agree with the percentage break down, very accurate. Its much more important to see a friendly, supportive face than to hear them utter the perfect condolences. And not wearing a Hawaiian shirt with khakis would certainly be a bonus. But the open casket I still believe is superstitious folklore and will always be so. I'm not saying its a bad thing by any means, but I believe the 'closure' is more based on the foundation of the family's expectations. If you're within a culture socialized to expect an open casket then having that opportunity to hover over the body and cry and mourn is what your mind expects will come with the grieving process. But should there be a cremation, I have no doubt we would all find a picture, an old song, a memorial video, or something else to facilitate that closure. I don't believe pseudo taxidermy is necessary. Everyone has their own ways in which to mourn and move on, be it from a pet or living being.. Not only because we all grieve differently, but it would also depend on the depth of your relationship with the deceased, and I can't see any academic study objectively quantifying those variables. That's why your living funeral is certainly the best idea. haha Now all I can think about is the food that would be served. Italian in life and death. And speaking of food Steve...have you tried the tuna with green onions, tomato, chedder and salami sandwich yet? The key is the salami. Its killer. ;) I completely agree with the percentage break down, very accurate. Its much more important to see a friendly, supportive face than to hear them utter the perfect condolences. And not wearing a Hawaiian shirt with khakis would certainly be a bonus.

But the open casket I still believe is superstitious folklore and will always be so. I’m not saying its a bad thing by any means, but I believe the ‘closure’ is more based on the foundation of the family’s expectations. If you’re within a culture socialized to expect an open casket then having that opportunity to hover over the body and cry and mourn is what your mind expects will come with the grieving process. But should there be a cremation, I have no doubt we would all find a picture, an old song, a memorial video, or something else to facilitate that closure. I don’t believe pseudo taxidermy is necessary.

Everyone has their own ways in which to mourn and move on, be it from a pet or living being.. Not only because we all grieve differently, but it would also depend on the depth of your relationship with the deceased, and I can’t see any academic study objectively quantifying those variables. That’s why your living funeral is certainly the best idea. haha Now all I can think about is the food that would be served. Italian in life and death.

And speaking of food Steve…have you tried the tuna with green onions, tomato, chedder and salami sandwich yet? The key is the salami. Its killer. ;)

]]> By: Steven http://www.perfectlyturbulent.com/comedy-at-the-funeral-parlour/comment-page-1/#comment-1388 Steven Sun, 26 Oct 2008 11:52:38 +0000 http://www.perfectlyturbulent.com/?p=344#comment-1388 I, having attended many an Italian funeral, know they are intense. I think they are simply reflections of the ways in which Italians live and love - passionately. Open caskets are a good thing - they actually have shown to give the family and relatives more 'closure' with the person actually being gone. They their loved ones in the flesh one last time. Not a bad thing in my opinion. What pisses me off about funerals is that they are these big whoop-la's for you that you can't even attend. I'm a proponent of the living funeral. Say you get to like 65-70yrs. I want to throw a party, where people take time off work, fly great distances, get all dressed up, rent a hall, spend money on nice furnishings and food, and celebrate my life - but dammit I want to be there. I guess the point is, funerals are not for the dead, but for the living. So what do you do - "I'm sorry for your loss". That's it. Showing up is 90% of it, 5% in saying the right thing (or not saying the wrong thing), and 5% is looking respectable. I, having attended many an Italian funeral, know they are intense. I think they are simply reflections of the ways in which Italians live and love – passionately. Open caskets are a good thing – they actually have shown to give the family and relatives more ‘closure’ with the person actually being gone. They their loved ones in the flesh one last time. Not a bad thing in my opinion.

What pisses me off about funerals is that they are these big whoop-la’s for you that you can’t even attend. I’m a proponent of the living funeral. Say you get to like 65-70yrs. I want to throw a party, where people take time off work, fly great distances, get all dressed up, rent a hall, spend money on nice furnishings and food, and celebrate my life – but dammit I want to be there.

I guess the point is, funerals are not for the dead, but for the living. So what do you do – “I’m sorry for your loss”. That’s it. Showing up is 90% of it, 5% in saying the right thing (or not saying the wrong thing), and 5% is looking respectable.

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