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Cottage Bonding

Posted by on August 29, 2007

What do you call 4 guys in a humble cottage during a very rainy 3 days?

Answer: My life this past weekend.

What was supposed to be a weekend filled with water sports, outdoor barbecuing, heavy drinking and debauchery quickly turned into a weekend of board games, limited drinking, table tennis and poorly organized dinners.

Our first day there, we managed to get ourselves into the lake, 2 guys went on a near death canoeing adventure while myself and another buddy hopped in a paddle boat for a relaxing stroll.

As we approached our 45th min of paddle boating and my legs began to scream for relief,  the skies opened up and started pouring down rain.  As we headed back to the dock I learned a VERY important lesson about paddle boats.  No matter how fast you pump your legs, the boat will never, ever, ever go fast.  I might have had better results taking off my shirt and using it as a make-shift sail.  To add insult to injury, as we were still 5min away our good friends back at the cottage could be heard yelling, “Do you want me to throw you guys an umbrella?”  Very funny motherf*&%er.

The rest of the trip consisted of three games of Monopoly – all of which I lost miserably at – one game of Trivial Pursuit(victorious!!), and more games of ping-pong than any man should EVER play over the course of 3 days.

We had planned on driving out to a small town bar on the Saturday night, but when 10pm rolled around and we had just finished a possibly 5000 calorie per guest meal, no one had any intention of shaving or showering, it was decided we would all be better off on the couch belching and expelling gas until one by one we all passed out.  Yes indeed, we do put the ASS in class.

As the next morning provided more familiar rain, we packed up and headed home.

Though it wasn’t the most exciting weekend of my life, the quiet of the cottage life was surely a welcomed break from the constant traffic, cigarette smoke, and unnecessary phone calls that city life brings.

The only thing missing was the sun.

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